When he doesn't leave

I have been reading your blog for awhile now. I am also seeing a married man and have been for 3 years now. He promised to leave his wife after 1 year but that was two years ago and he is now saying he can't leave because his kids are not 'robust' enough. I know he loves me. But it is hard knowing he shares a beautiful home, 2 kids and all the holiday with his wife playing happy families while I am left out in the cold. What should I do?

Dear Stuckpeg,
I do sympathize I really do. My own emotions are waxing and waning. Some days I find myself hoping for more and hoping LOverboy will leave but then I got into my relationship as just a temporary fling so that is unrealistic and I remind myself that.

• Don't pin your hopes on him - remind yourself of his faults including being a lying cheat!!


• Date other men - go to single events, sign up to Dinnerdates.com, internet dating and make youself available - Let him know he is not the only game in town


• Make plans for holidays - Do something outrageous like trying skydiving


• Beware the mind poo - don't think about him when he is not arround


• Don't try to guess his thoughts men who cheat are selfish by nature


• He lies to you and he lies to her so don't fall for his excuses


• Remind yourself that what he tells you about their relationship is not necessarily true


• Be independent and only see him when it suits you


• Be fabulous, sexy beautiful and unobtainable

Be funny, charming and light around him. Do not make demands of any kind and that includes asking him when he will leave his wife. Don't let your life revolve around his. Do as you please and let him to the chasing. Chasing him will make him retreat. By dating and living your own life he may feel you are slipping away and leave his wife. But he will only leave if he is ready to do so. You cannot change this. But by living your own life you will be less hurt and not feel as though your life is on hold. You may also meet some one more deserving of your love and end it of your own accord. He may not be totally happy in his marriage but married life still has a powerful hold on most men. It is usally the wife that starts the divorce process.

Lady Salacity